Click pic to embiggen and assume a new position to be screwed

For some reason, this reminds me of the speech in the genius Coen brothers film, The Hudsucker Proxy:

You punch in at 8:30 every morning, except you punch in at 7:30 following a business holiday, unless it’s a Monday, then you punch in at 8 o’clock. Punch in late and they dock you. Incoming articles get a voucher, outgoing articles provide a voucher. Move any article without a voucher and they dock you. Letter size a green voucher, oversize a yellow voucher, parcel size a maroon voucher. Wrong color voucher and they dock you! 6787049A/6. That is your employee number. It will not be repeated! Without your employee number you cannot get your paycheck. Inter-office mail is code 37, intra-office mail 37-3, outside mail is 3-37. Code it wrong and they dock you! This has been your orientation. Is there anything you do not understand, is there anything you understand only partially? If you have not been fully oriented, you must file a complaint with personnel. File a faulty complaint and they dock you!

Gov. Bobby Jindal approved legislation Thursday creating a new public school curriculum with lowered academic standards, waving aside objections from education advocates who say the change will produce high school graduates who lack basic English and math skills.

Bobby Jindal

Under the new law, students 15 and older could leave the standard curriculum and instead take a “career track” if they have parental approval. They would face easier requirements for graduation and a curriculum less geared toward college preparation. It would also allow eighth graders to advance to ninth grade without passing the state’s high-stakes standardized test.

Graduates would get a “career option” diploma, different from the state’s standard diploma, designed to get them into a two-year technical school or community college but not four-year schools.

Via Mister Justin.

I couldn’t help but think of how the Clintons were so obsessed over treatment of their daughter Chelsea that they got NBC to censor a Wayne’s World sketch that mentioned her.

I wonder how the Obamas will react to a joke about kidnapping their daughters, tying them up, and keeping them in a basement. And about whether you should toss them in the ocean to drown or put them in a hot air balloon to die after you get bored with them.

But even more interestingly, I wonder whether the so called liberal media will go ape-shit over this little piece of satire and make a big deal out of it. Calling for terminations, apologies, retractions and the what not.

My guess is that Cracked’s readership is small enough that it might go unnoticed. But this also might be Cracked’s grab at the brass ring, hoping for enough press to put it in the big leagues with satire sites such as the Onion. Who knows, maybe one day Cracked will be successful enough to release its own crappy direct-to-DVD movie. Now there’s a goal worth striving for!

Why hasn’t Jessie Jackson been screeching about this? Will there be a cyber marches on Facebook’s server farms? “I have a dream…”

Abandon your MySpace account for Facebook? You might just be a racist.

At a keynote speech during New York’s Democracy forum at Lincoln Center, Danah Boyd spoke of the racial disparity and possible reasons for mass abandonment of MySpace for the “more cultured” and “less cheesy” social networking site Facebook. Boyd, a social media researcher for Microsoft and fellow of the Harvard University Berkman Center for Internet and Society, stated:

“We might as well face an uncomfortable reality … what happened was modern day ‘white flight’.”

Boyd also observed that:

“The fact that digital migration is revealing the same social patterns as urban white flight should send warning signals to all of us. It should scare the hell out of us.”

Referring to MySpace as the “ghetto of the digital landscape,” Boyd indicated that MySpace users are more likely to be “brown or black” and espouse a different set of ideals in conflict with those espoused by the teens she surveyed over four years. She said that patterns in migration across social networking sites echoed those of a white exodus from cities in the past. Boyd also said that teens who use Facebook are more likely to condescend their MySpace-favoring peers.

“Any high school student who has a Facebook page will tell you MySpace users are more likely to be barely educated and obnoxious… like Peet’s is more cultured than Starbucks and jazz is more cultured than bubblegum pop. And Macs are more cultured than PCs.”

Paleontologists visiting the Creation Museum at the conclusion of a convention got more than they bargained for when they found their life’s work under attack.

After having a few laughs and taking some pictures, most were surprised and offended to see the way in which evolution was being ridiculed by the museum, which some call a “creationist Disneyland”.

“It’s sort of a monument to scientific illiteracy, isn’t it?” Jerry Lipps, professor of geology, paleontology and evolution at University of California, Berkeley, told the AFP news agency. “Like Sunday school with statues… this is a special brand of religion here. I don’t think even most mainstream Christians would believe in this interpretation of Earth’s history.”

Some 715,000 patrons have visited the $27 million museum since it opened in mid-2007 to “bring the pages of the Bible to life.” The 70,000 square-foot facility presents a literal interpretation of the Bible, and suggests that disbelief of this view leads to moral relativism and the breakdown of social values.

University of Akron paleontology professor Lisa Park was moved to tears as she walked down a hallway displaying flashing images of war, famine and natural disasters that the museum blames on belief in evolution.

“I think it’s very bad science and even worse theology — and the theology is far more offensive to me,” Park told the AFP news agency.
[...]
Howard University anatomy professor Daryl Domning shook his head several times throughout his tour of the museum. “This bothers me as a scientist and as a Christian, because it’s just as much a distortion and misrepresentation of Christianity as it is of science,” he told the AFP. “It’s not your old-time religion by any means.”

Here’s a more in-depth report on the visit, plus an interesting fact (if you can use that word about the museum) one gets from the displays.

Interesting…